


Wild Hearts

by kajivar



Category: Dracula (TV 2013)
Genre: F/F, Yuletide, Yuletide 2014, mystery fandom also contained within, this show died far too young
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-20
Updated: 2014-12-20
Packaged: 2018-03-02 11:32:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2810603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kajivar/pseuds/kajivar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Mina's rejection, Lucy is in pain, but she finds a new friend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Wild Hearts

**Author's Note:**

  * For [elektra121](https://archiveofourown.org/users/elektra121/gifts).



> Happy Yuletide, elektra121! I hope you enjoy.
> 
> Thank you to LLwyden for the beta. <3

Lucy didn’t remember why she'd decided to return to the absinthe club. Was it to remind herself of happier times with Mina, when they’d been so carefree and decadent and laughing and clinging to one another so as not to fall? No, more likely it was just to make herself numb. To make herself forget.

She wished she could undo the last few weeks. A natural part of a woman’s maturation, Lady Jayne had called Lucy’s feelings for another woman; Mina likely felt the same. But there’d been no affection in Mina’s eyes when she’d told her to leave after Lucy confessed her feelings. There had been disgust. Betrayal. Revulsion. It had been the same look Minerva Westenra had given her when Lucy later asked why her mother had never told her it was perfectly natural to fall in love with another woman. Why had Lady Jayne lied to her? Or was she just mistaken? Lucy could think of no reason Jayne would purposely mislead her about such things.

After Mina's rejection, she should have known better than to listen to Jayne's suggestion that Lucy seduce Jonathan Harker as revenge, to teach Mina a lesson. Her heart hadn't truly been in it, and despite Jayne’s lessons, she'd felt awkward and foolish. What was the point? Hurting Mina wouldn’t make her love Lucy; it would only turn her feelings to hatred. 

And Mina did blame her for what had happened, despite it ultimately being all Jonathan’s choice. Lucy had flirted with him and lied to him about her affections, but she hadn't forced him to her bed. She hadn't invited him to her home that night. He had come to her, unexpected and in a dark mood. It had been rough and passionless, and while he seemed to take some pleasure in it, she had not. After he’d left the next morning, she’d scrubbed herself raw in the bath to get the feel of him off of her, disgusted with herself.

She wanted to forget it all, go back to a time when she and Mina were the best of friends and she merely pined silently. She should never have spoken of her feelings to anyone. Here at the absinthe bar she could pretend, at least. She wasn’t the awful person that Mina and Jonathan seemed to think she was.

After she’d settled in a loveseat in a shadowed corner of one room, a server brought the glass of absinthe and set it on the small table in front of her, where the instruments to finish preparing her drink already lay. She picked up a sugar cube and dipped it briefly in the liqueur, then placed the absinthe spoon across the top of the glass and set the cube atop it. Striking a match, she set the cube afire, watching the blue flames melt the sugar, which dripped slowly into the green liquid below. When the fire died, she dunked the spoon into the drink and stirred as she poured cold water into the mixture. Emerald turned to a paler, milky green, and she brought the glass to her lips, taking a sip and willing the absinthe to return her to happier times.

She settled back and watched the other people there with half-closed eyes. Some were quiet and alone, like herself; others were couples, twined as they drank, or dancing from room to room. In the next room over, she caught sight of two young women, laughing and falling against one another, and she felt a pang of loneliness and rejection.

A dark haired woman drifted past her vision and she sat up and cried out. “Mina!”

The woman turned toward her. She had Mina’s long black hair and beautiful pale skin, but no, she was not her. Lucy slumped back, fighting back tears. She hadn’t let herself cry though any of this yet. Her sorrow was kept walled inside her heart, for tears would admit her shame.

“Don’t cry, dear heart.” The woman slid into the seat next to her, touching a cool hand to her cheek as Lucy tried to look away, pulling her gaze back. “Tell me what troubles you.”

Lucy shook her head. “I can’t,” she said. “I have already done enough wrong.”

“You can talk to me,” the woman urged. “I cannot bear to see such a beautiful young woman in pain.” Her voice had a faint accent; German perhaps, or Austrian. 

Lucy hesitated, Mina and her mother’s reactions to her admission still fresh in her mind. But this place was well known for decadence and debauchery. Maybe she wouldn’t be judged.

“I am in love,” she said. “With another woman.” She braced herself for the response.

The woman laughed, gently, not mockingly. “And that is cause for such sorrow? I think not. Unless you told her of your feelings and she rejected you?” The amusement faded from her face, and her expression turned compassionate.

“Someone told me it was natural to love another woman,” Lucy said, eyes downcast. “But Mina looked at me with such revulsion when I told her. As did my mother.”

The woman tucked her hand under Lucy’s chin to bring her face back up. “It is natural,” she said. “But unfortunately there are many who do not understand this. And so they call it wrong, or sin, and condemn it to the shadows. But you are not alone in how you feel, my dear. I have loved many women in my life.”

“You have?” Lucy sat up straighter now, staring at her new friend with much more interest. Rejection and Jayne's possible lies should have made her wary, but she hungered for touch and the knowledge she wasn't alone. “Will you…show me?” she asked hesitantly.

The woman glanced thoughtfully over at Lucy’s absinthe glass, still well over half-full. “That is not just the green fairy talking, is it?” she said. 

Lucy shook her head. “No,” she said. The pain in her heart was giving way to longing. This woman wasn't Mina, but there was no harm in pretending, was there? 

“I just want to know…that this pain will end," she said. "That there is not something wrong with me. That what I feel is natural, and there are others who feel the same."

Cupping Lucy’s face in both hands now, the woman leaned in and brought their lips together. Her kiss was gentle and slow, so unlike Jonathan’s hard ones, and it made an ache begin to build between Lucy’s legs. She closed her eyes and parted her lips with a soft moan, and the woman’s tongue slid between them. Thoughts of Mina fled; in her dreams, her friend's kisses had always been shy, not nearly as aggressive as this. And Lucy liked it.

After a long moment, the woman drew back, and Lucy opened her eyes. “Please, don’t stop,” she begged. The kiss had been so soft and sensuous, and it chased away the shame she felt over the reactions of the others who knew her secret. Jayne’s words of assurance had been one thing, now mistrusted after Lucy had followed her advice with disastrous results. The kiss had been a stronger acceptance. She wasn’t alone. She wasn’t unnatural.

“My poor girl,” the woman said, moving one hand to stroke Lucy’s golden hair. “Your poor wounded heart. You have been misled and ill-used, haven’t you? You should feel no shame whatsoever for your desires. They are part of who you are, part of what makes you unique and special and wonderful.”

She leaned in for another kiss, her fingers drifting downward to caress Lucy’s breasts through the bodice of her gown, then lower still. She hiked up Lucy’s skirts and slid her hand beneath, fingertips lightly brushing the skin of her inner thighs in a way that made Lucy tense in anticipation.

Then her fingers were touching her in a manner that Lucy had only been touched by herself before, and Lucy’s head fell back with a loud gasp of pleasure. She didn’t care if anyone noticed or watched. She just closed her eyes and trembled as the woman’s fingers gently explored and stroked and coaxed pleasure from her. 

Her lover made a soft noise of approval as her touch grew more intense, and she dropped her mouth to Lucy’s neck, kissing and nibbling. Lucy clutched at her, feeling as if she were at the edge of a precipice, about to fall. “Oh, god, oh, god!” she cried as a blinding rush of pleasure swept through her body.

The woman drew back again, smiling at Lucy as she withdrew her hand. “Come to my home, my dearest, and I will show you so much more,” she promised. She licked her fingertips, promise in her eyes.

Still dazed with pleasure, Lucy nodded, rising to her feet, clutching the woman’s hand. “I don’t even know your name,” she said with a giddy laugh.

The woman brought Lucy’s hand up to her lips and kissed it, flicking the tip of her tongue against the skin between two fingers in a way that made Lucy’s knees feel weak again. “I have gone by many names,” the woman said. “But you may call me Carmilla.”

**Author's Note:**

> The "Wild Hearts" title comes from a quote from J. Sheridan LeFanu's _Carmilla_ \-- "She used to place her pretty arms about my neck, draw me to her, and laying her cheek to mine, murmur with her lips near my ear, 'Dearest, your little heart is wounded; think me not cruel because I obey the irresistible law of my strength and weakness; if your dear heart is wounded, my wild heart bleeds with yours.'"


End file.
